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When
it comes to painting, Monet had it easy: a nice clean canvas,
a limited palette and a penchant for soft-focus water lilies.
You have it hard: chalky, peeling exterior walls, the need
for sharply delineated lines and an unlimited choice of colors.
Let's face it: Painting your house, especially the exterior,
isn't an easy job. But in the wild optimism of spring, you
made up your mind to paint this summer, so let's talk about
how to make it easier.
Painting has a completely unearned reputation as a trade any
amateur can tackle with no knowledge, experience or skills.
Beep - wrong! Just because you can't electrocute yourself
or cut off your finger doesn't mean this is unskilled labor.
Yes, all of us can get paint on the wall - it's doing it efficiently
and making it look good that's the hard part.
OK, everyone who's a bit obsessive stand over in this corner
with me. You are instantly qualified to pull off the most
tedious and difficult part of painting, the part that amateurs
inevitably botch - the preparation. Like kids, we all want
to "get to the fun stuff" right away, which is changing
the color of some big surface.
This is the path of doom, however, for the paint's ability
to adhere to the wall for more than five minutes is directly
related to how much time and care you've lavished on the surface
before you crank up the roller.
Prep Work Is Nasty
There
is one natural law of the universe that controls painting: All
preparation work is nasty. You could also add dirty, tiring,
frustrating and many other fine adjectives, but this is a short
article. The difference between the slightly obsessive amateur
and the professional is simply the amount of time and elbow
grease it takes to prepare the surface properly.
The amateur tends to use slower, inefficient methods and tools,
often under the mistaken impression that investing lots of time
in a job somehow increases the quality. As those of you who've
wielded a vibrating sander or a dull paint scraper all day know,
the object of preparation is most definitely to finish the job
right but finish it quickly.
Quick does not mean hasty. This is where all of us obsessive
types get our due - you have to prep all surfaces, not just
the easily reachable ones, and you have to take special care
on problem spots, like peeling, cracking, chalking and glossy
areas.
So what is preparation? The most important step is cleaning
the surface. There's absolutely no sex appeal in this - no screaming
saw motors, no fancy woodworking tools - just a bucket of water,
some TSP and a sponge. No wonder everyone avoids this - it's
no different than house cleaning. (For large exterior surfaces,
rent a power washer from the local tool rental company.)
Paint is a very forgiving material, but one thing it refuses
to abide is a dirty, greasy surface. In prim protest, it peels
or flakes off. So cleaning does not mean just lightly wiping
the wall off with a damp sponge; it means scrubbing in areas
like kitchens and exterior surfaces where grease or a layer
of grime has accumulated.
Rough Surface For New Paint
Surfaces
with a nonglossy, flat finish are usually ready to paint after
a thorough cleaning; satin, semigloss or gloss surfaces must
be sanded to give the new paint a rough surface to cling to.
The first step in sanding is to buy some stock in 3M or another
sandpaper manufacturer, because you're going to use a lot of
sandpaper if you want to finish the job quickly. You can always
tell the amateur by his or her sandpaper. Is it limp and worn
almost smooth from being used all week? Yup, an amateur. Sandpaper
cuts really well for only a few minutes; then the abrasives
lose their sharp edges and you have to work a lot harder and
longer for the same results.
A Superior Job
There
are three great things about quality painting tools: they're
still made in the United States, they last almost forever -
even brushes - and they do a job so superior to that attainable
with cheap stuff that you just want to kick yourself for ever
using a $3 brush and a $19 sander.
If you are a skeptic, please go out and buy just one Purdy brand
brush. It will cost about $15 or $20 for a small 2-inch brush.
Now try painting anything. Right away the paint flows more easily
and you don't have to pick bristles out of the paint all the
time; suddenly, the job looks great. If you clean it well after
every use, it will last a decade or two.
Big 20-by-20-foot drop cloths aren't cheap, either, but they
eliminate the spoor of the amateur - the drops of paint on the
floor, on the shrubbery, on everything. The little plastic tarps
are cheap, but they tear and can be slippery.
The same goes for electric sanders. Most painters seem to like
the little palm sanders that require only one hand. Good ones
generally cost between $60 and $100. The cheap ones vibrate
your nerves more than the sandpaper and they tend to generate
this annoying, grating buzz after a while.
If you're prepping the exterior of your home, buy or rent a
decent ladder. It will set you back $60 or so for a short one
and up to $200 for a long extension ladder, but then isn't your
safety worth the extra investment? You can also rent professional
quality ladders by the week from tool rental outfits.
Last but certainly not least, buy a rubber dust mask with extra
filters and plastic safety goggles for when you're sanding or
spray-painting. The little paper dust masks are better than
nothing but you want a better one if you're going to be sanding
or spraying more than a few minutes.
Last Two Tools
The last
two tools you'll need to do a professional prep job are equally
unexciting: masking tape and a screwdriver. A screwdriver? Is
this some sort of trick answer? No, the screwdriver is for taking
off all the light switch plates, handles and other hardware.
Yes, some previous owner painted over every one but you're made
of sterner stuff; you're going to remove them all and replace
them with new ones after you've finished painting.
Now your job looks professional, even if you aren't. It wasn't
easy, but it was worth it - wasn't it?
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